CDU Chancellor candidate Armin Laschet traveled to the flood area and had to laugh heartily on the edge of a performance. In 2002 the flood was the first to wash the Social Democratic candidate across the finish line, and Laschet is now tearing them away from the position they believed to be safe. From Micky Beisenherz
Well, admittedly, it was always clear: at some point in Germany someone would have to apologize publicly for laughing. However, it was also an unprecedentedly inopportune moment that Armin Laschet chose to give a hearty twist.
In front the Federal President in ‘Thoughts and Prayers’ mode lamenting the dead and devastation of the flood, behind him the man who would like to become Chancellor, smirking and cheering. That doesn’t look good to say the least. How he curls up and makes this strange face. One would like to say: Laschet, who reliably answers puffy under pressure, even expresses himself unhappy when he bites his tongue.
Micky Beisenherz: Sorry, I’m private here
My name is Micky Beisenherz. I’m a world star in Castrop-Rauxel. I have to pay for everything myself elsewhere. I am a multimedia
(In) grocery store. Author (Extra3, jungle camp), presenter (ZDF, NDR, ProSieben, ntv), podcast host (‘Apocalypse and filter coffee’), occasional cartoonist. There are things that I notice. Sometimes even get upset. And since the impulse control is constantly jammed, they have to get out. My religious symbol is the crosshair. The razor blade is my dance floor. And just now my feet are itching again.
Even the British ‘Guardian’ it prominently reported: ‘Frontrunner to succeed Merkel’ sorry ‘for joking amid fresh German floods’. What a crazy, crazy line. You don’t want to read that about yourself. The fact remains: Laschet always appears most confident when he does not appear.
Now the man is not a characterless pig or a cold ignoramus. Many of us have laughed at the most inopportune places, and laughing at the wrong time can be a stress reliever – it would just be nice not to be filmed.
That countless people then ‘tell us all what was so funny, Mr Laschet!’ demanded, rather testifies to the fact that there are apparently a large number of failed teacher training students on social networks who can live out their fantasies of omnipotence in the digital classroom Twitter.
Laughter as a middle finger in the face of a population
But of course, the tipping point seems to have finally been reached. Where in 2002 the flood was supposed to wash the Social Democratic candidate over the finish line first, it tears Laschet away from the position he believed to be safe. He could have had his Schröder moment, he created his Steinbrück moment. Laughing as the middle finger in the face of a population hoping for comfort and redemption.
The power of images. The kneeling of Warsaw. Fisherman in sneakers. Kohl takes Mitterand’s hand. Whether Angela Merkel had this image in mind when she supported Malu Dreyer while walking through the Rhineland-Palatinate crisis area and thus showed her solidarity with a woman whose action and leadership should be closer to her than the performance of ‘her’ Chancellor candidate Laschet? Which she just didn’t visit.
In guilt, the Chancellor once again showed the pleasant withdrawnness for which many will still miss her. She only lost her composure for a short moment when she publicly lashed out at the abuse of a ‘Bild’ reporter during the press conference, and that’s basically not wrong. And a majority, of course. Merkel is to blame, Laschet the atonement.
The inappropriately well-humored Aachener would of course not have been able to play this ‘rubber boots on and unbureaucratically help’ moment like Schröder back then. The grimly determined former chancellor would have been taken from the flood as God’s wrath, while Laschet, through his politics, is literally in the brown liquor for which he is responsible. Or wanted to take responsibility in the future until the flood had made it clear to the last that it couldn’t go on like this.
With the Greens you can take a deep breath
That the hashtag architects are now turning a regional prince, who had only replaced a red-green state government in 2017, into a quarterly Satan, while Angela ‘the artist formerly known as climate chancellor’ Merkel, of all things, gets the woman Herzchenaugen and Candystorms, which lasts for 16 years had carried out climate protection at the federal level shows that we fall in love above all with our own stories. Realities, on the other hand, roll off as reliably as raindrops on the Wellensteyn functional jacket by Laschet.
The pictures from the weekend didn’t happen to Merkel, they didn’t happen to Kohl with the dikemaster and they would certainly not have happened to the unmatched authenticity actor Söder. It also suits someone who hides his entire campaign. After all, the Union candidate has impressively demonstrated that unprofessionalismnois a feminine distinctive feature.
As cynical as it is: With the Greens you can take a deep breath. The core eco-political issue will be with us at least until September 26th (2083), the ‘Fuck you Greta’ faction can no longer find their Mustang in waist-high water and whether ‘Plagiarism hunters’ Weber can comb through the Baerbock book with them Having taken vacation, people are now interested in something like ARD Popnacht in WDR.
In the end it was abundantly clear what the Green camp had issued as a directive: We are now chewing as much Habeck as possible into the thin soup so that people can see: ‘If you choose THAT, you will get a lot of THAT!’ It might work.
After the initial shock, old habits prevail
But it is much more likely that people will fall back into their old habits and images after the initial shock. They read: On the one hand there is the reliably tumbling Rhineland Hollande and on the other hand this ambitious woman with the funny book, ‘where everything wasn’t so clean!’
We all scream to get back to the subject, but are we really able to grasp that? Actually a classic reflex: The big questions of politics quickly become too complex and overwhelming for us – so we take refuge in mock battles, ask Laschet on the board to explain to us all what was so funny or let Baerbock recite parts of a housework that she never wrote herself.
That we do not feel completely silly, that in view of the annual flood of the century we are discussing for a day and a half whether the NRW Prime Minister said ‘Tschundigung, young woman’ or ‘sorry young, woman …’ in the WDR crisis talk. Why not use linguists and decoding machines to give the banality a scientific coating?
We are messing up the election campaign because many of us simply overwhelm the desired ‘factual issues’. The complexity of things, the entanglements, the causalities. The punch line of this political stumbling block could be that the Social Democratic candidate has better chances than previously thought. Olaf Scholz seems to be the alternative that, in all its inconspicuousness, comes closest to the German cross-section.
The politics go well with this: a bit of a departure like the Greens, too little vain to bother with a Frankenstein from a book and steady enough to ‘everything was really great up to now’ with one big blow To reach those who want to fundamentally change Germany – as long as most things stay as they are. Yes, speaks against it: He is a candidate for the SPD. And about as exciting as a beige cargo vest, but inconspicuousness is currently by far the strongest plus of the person who wants to win this election campaign.
Chancellor Scholz? We couldn’t have deserved better
And if we are absolutely not allowed to keep Merkel, in the end we might decide in favor of the version that most closely resembles her in all its brittle indecency and predictability. Sure, there is Wirecard, CumEx, Warburg-Bank, but to break down exactly what you are accusing him of in detail is so complicated that it is easier to mock those who constantly prettify things or the other person there, who laughs so stupidly.
It is the performative that counts. And in a class where two people point out all the time in order to make themselves ridiculous, the one who just sits away with a stable three for the year is moved. In the meantime, I no longer consider it so unjustified that Olaf Scholz is allowed to appear at Triell as the SPD’s candidate for chancellor.
Chancellor Scholz? We really couldn’t have deserved it better. Nobody can really say what the next two months will bring – we will only be able to rely on total unpredictability.